Well my day yesterday sure was spent in a wasteful way as I had to go to court to testify for a man fighting to see his children more. I say wasteful because I was there not really knowing either parents but because of my service to the community in scouting I was dragged in on it. I often wonder why people in divorces don't stop and think about the children and what is best for them..In this case I found myself really thinking that neither really needed the children. I also found myself mad at the people for not being considerate enough not to make me go thru this mess at this time. The outcome of this?? I have no idea, I was honest and that is all I can be..
It sure doesn't help the down feelings I have been having and surely is not the good thing I have been waiting for around the corner..
I hope today brings better things. It looks like another sunny day and I think close to 80 degrees today. As I woke up this morning I laid thinking about my life, about how I feel. I just really wonder if those I love realizes so many things, as how hard it is to do things sometimes, how depressed I really am, how there are days I don't think I can, the lonely feelings, the scared feelings when something hurts, and just how much I love them all. Each day is a challenge in many ways and I am thankful for all of it..The grass seems greener, the sky more blue, the sun has more warmth, and life is good and more thankful everyday I am here. I can't imagine being back where I was even a year ago. If this is what Cancer is about, the journey that it takes you on, I must be strong and I must be fighter. I think this is more than I realize. So the journey goes on and I will enjoy another beautiful day...always Judy
3 days ago